Episode 4 - How To Change A Habit

 

[PRE]

 

You’re listening to episode number four of The Identity Factor podcast. If there’s one episode you want to take notes on it’s this one because you’re about to learn how you can change ANY habit all on your own. I talk a lot about what subconscious reprogramming is, and we’ve only barely scratched the surface, but now it’s time to teach you how to apply what you’ve learned so that you can literally DESIGN the life you want by modifying your habits at a subconscious level.

 

[INTRO]

 

Hi there, I’m Anthony Serino and by joining this podcast, you’ve started a life-changing journey with me as your tour guide. You’re now also part of a community of like-minded individuals who light this world with passion. As a high performance coach and expert in habit modification I’ve worked with amazing individuals from all over the world who have transformed their lives from within . As you listen to this podcast, you’re going to get an inside look at my science-based approach to transformation.

 

[BODY]

 

If you don’t have what you want in life, it’s because you’re not that type of person. And since you’re not that type of person, you’ll never consistently do the types of things needed to get what you want.

 

And this is because, (and you’ve heard me say this before if you’ve listened to earlier episodes), everything you have or don’t have, is a direct result of your habits. And habits aren’t just the things you do or the behaviors you have. Habits also include your thoughts and emotional responses. 

 

But for right now let’s focus on the things you DO…

 

I’m sure you’ve heard the phrase, “actions speak louder than words”… which of course simply means how someone behaves is much more impactful than the things they say and that their behavior is much more indicative of what type of person they really are.

 

Well I’m going to modify it a bit.

 

You ready?

 

YOUR actions speak louder than your THOUGHTS.

 

And by actions, I’m really referring to your habits. In the last episode, we discussed what habits are at a neurological level.. And how everything we do, think, and feel is habituated by our brain.

 

If you haven’t listened to that episode yet, be sure to go back and give it a listen because it really sets the stage for what we are discussing in this episode, HOW to change your habits.

 

On that note, many people have asked me… do we really have to KNOW how the brain works in order to make the changes we want to make. 

 

And I’m going to make this crystal clear for you and say “absolutely, 100%, without a doubt… you MUST learn how your brain works if you want to make lasting changes in your life”

 

Because every action, thought, feeling, and emotion is rooted in the brain. 

 

And all of it is subconscious or unconscious habit that runs automatically, every day, below the threshold of conscious awareness. 

 

But listen, if you’re happy with where you’re at in life… you feel good when you look at your bank account, you feel good when you look in the mirror, you feel good when you look at your relationships or your business… then, you probably don’t need to know how the brain works.

 

BUT if ANY part of your life is lacking… then I promise you… as you begin to understand how your brain works and finally realize that you can control the way your brain functions. THAT is when you will experience massive, rapid transformation.

 

It all comes down to control. 

 

And you already have that control, you may just not know it yet.

 

And these aren’t just cute words I know how to say… this podcast isn’t about motivating you.. Although I’m confident that will come as a byproduct, 

 

This is all practical, science-based information ANYONE can use to design the life they want. 

 

Think about this for a moment… 

 

If your car was running fine and got you from where you are to where you want to be, day in and day out, there would be no need to check under the hood or know how your engine works. 

 

However, if every couple of days your car wouldn’t start… or maybe it even stalled while you were driving… and you weren’t able to get from point A to point B…

 

Then it would make sense for you to have some mechanical knowledge if you wanted to fix it yourself.

 

Of course, you could hire a mechanic to fix your car for you… the same way people hire me to help them transform their lives... 

 

But that’s not why you are here. You are here, interacting with this podcast, because there’s things in your life you want to change YOURSELF.

 

Now, as a high performance coach and expert in habit modification… there are only two things, and two things only, people come to me for… 

 

Either they are doing things they know they shouldn’t be doing, despite consciously telling themselves not to...

 

OR they are NOT doing things they know they need to be doing, even though they are telling themselves to get off their ass and do it.

 

And these THINGS are always habits… actions they are doing, thoughts they are thinking, emotions they are feeling. 

 

So what are you trying to change? And how many times have you tried to change that thing, and it just never seems to stick?

 

And you can hope, wish, and pray all you want… but that’s just your conscious, analytical voice talking to you… it’s the same voice that has told you to do this or don’t do that… yet you continue doing or not doing those things. 

 

The funny part is that it’s going to sound like I’m contradicting myself later in this episode because I’m going to explain to you how you actually DO need to step in consciously in order to make changes at a subconscious level.

 

You’ll understand what I’m talking about a little bit.

 

Before we get into specific techniques and strategies... let’s talk a bit more about the “why” and the “how” when it comes to the role your brain plays in modifying your habits. 

 

I’m about to expand on what I discussed in the last episode, so if you haven’t listened to that one yet, you really should pause this one and give it a listen, or be sure to listen to it right after we finish up here. 

 

Oh, and a couple of notes about how I produce these episodes… you might hear noises in the background, and I may trip over my own words here and there, but for the most part, I’m not going to edit those things out. I record this in my home office, next to a busy road, with inexpensive audio equipment because I want this to be as close as possible to if you and I were just sitting in my living room chatting about all of this. 

 

On that note, please KNOW that I’d absolutely love to actually chat with you. So reach out on Facebook, Instagram, or by email. One of the main reasons I do what I do is because it lights me up to see REAL TIME transformation with REAL people…

Alright so where were we?

 

Yes, the brain. 

 

Did I mention this is science-based shit?! Shit being the medical term I believe. 

 

Anyways, In the last episode we talked about the prefontal cortex which is responsible for our conscious processes like reasoning and short term memory recall... and we also talked about the basal ganglia, or the “reptilian” part of the brain which is responsible for our subconscious processes that run our habituated behavior, thoughts, and emotional responses. 

 

So when talking about habits, the reason it’s so hard to break a bad habit is because we actually try to do it in a way that’s completely opposite to the way our brain works.

 

We constantly hear all over social media from self-help gurus and personal development coaches that we need to change our mindset.

 

And I’m here to tell you changing your mindset in the way they advocate for simply just wont work. What does changing your mindset really mean anyways?

 

If changing your mindset really worked… then tomorrow you’d wake up and say “I’m going to stop eating bread” or “I’m going to work out more” or “I’m going to stop biting my nails”... really insert any habit you’re trying to break or develop.

 

And what has happened in the past when you’ve done that? You’ve gotten up, told yourself you were absolutely done doing or not doing that thing, and maybe you felt good and in control throughout the day, and perhaps even the next day… but then the third, fourth, or even tenth day comes… and you start getting the urge to eat that food you told yourself not to, or your inner voice comes up with excuses to skip the gym or to start doing whatever it is you told yourself not to do and all of a sudden your back to your old habits. 

 

So if it was as simple as changing your mindset and talking yourself into or out of doing something… you’d be able to change your habits in a blink of on eye. But as I’m sure you’re beginning to realize… that just doesn’t work.

 

Because when you say you want to change your mindset, what you’re really saying is you want to change your habits.

 

And of course, we have all tried countless times to change our habits and fail to make anything stick. This is because we are working against the brain and not with it. 

 

When you try to change your habits with positive self-talk or thought and literally try to talk yourself out of or into doing something… all that is a left brain, prefrontal cortex, conscious process and habits as you now know, are a subconscious process which is rooted in the right brain and the reptilian part of your brain. 

 

I’ll explain all of that in more detail in a bit..

 

But once you learn how the brain actually works, it becomes unbelievably simple to modify your habits because habits are a neurological process and we can use science-based modalities to alter those neurological processes.

 

Also, it’s important to understand that a habit is an AUTOMATIC function which is activated subconsciously without any conscious thought or effort. It just happens.

 

For example… let’s say you’re driving your car while singing your favorite song with your friend in the passenger seat… you’re doing everything but focusing on driving. Then all of a sudden you approach a stoplight that has just turned yellow. Invariably… your foot instantly and automatically lets off the gas. You didn’t have to think… oh what does a yellow light mean? What happens after a yellow light? Your brain already developed a habit that results in you slowing down at a yellow light to prepare for a stop at a red light. You didn’t have to think about any of it consciously.

 

Of course, after that initial reaction to slow down, some of you New Yorkers put your foot back on the gas to get through before the light turns red… I know who you are … I live here. 

 

But in all seriousness.. After your brain has subconsciously triggered that habituated response, you CAN step in consciously to determine an alternative action, but what’s important to note here is that you had virtually ZERO control over the initial behavior and it happened automatically at a subconscious level.

 

This is how nearly EVERY behavior, thought, and emotional response happens. Your brain fires all of it off automatically without any analytical thought.

 

And yes, as I mentioned in the last episode… essentially…  you are on autopilot.

 

All the habits you have, your brain just runs them for you automatically.

 

Ok let’s back up a little bit and talk about the three major parts of your brain. You’ve heard me mention the prefrontal cortex before… that’s the thinking part of your brain consciously listening to and analyzing what I’m saying right now, it’s also responsible for what are called your executive functions (like planning, working memory, and self talk). In reference to what we are discussing in this episode, this part of your brain is responsible for how you THINK about your habits.

 

Then you have the limbic system or mammalian brain which is responsible for your emotions… or how you FEEL about your habits… 

 

And then of course, there’s the oldest part of the brain, the reptilian part which is responsible for survival and automating everything from your heart pumping, to your lungs breathing, to your habits. 

 

So your habits stem from the reptilian part of your brain, but you’ve been trying to use your analytical, prefrontal cortex to change everything. You’ve been trying to talk yourself into doing this thing or not doing that thing.

 

And what happens? The two parts of your brain battle each other. And you already know which one wins. It’s the same part that moves your foot to the break instantly and automatically when you see that yellow light… it’s the same part that triggers that anxiety… it’s the same part that causes you to eat that second piece of cake even though you told yourself not to.

 

What’s important to understand here is that conscious effort is virtually useless when attempting to modify your habits. 

 

And this makes sense… because the habits you currently have, both good and bad, were formed without any effort or use of willpower. 

 

The way out is the way in.

 

A psychologist and Harvard grad by the name of Dr. Knight Dunlap postulated that conscious effort is the biggest deterrent to modifying habits.. Having studied habits perhaps more in depth than nearly any other psychologist, Dr. Dunlap found that trying to refrain from a habit actually reinforced it. 

 

So what was his solution? Creating a clear mental image of the end result and the behavior pattern it took to get there. And yes, it can really be that simple. All you have to do, is visualize yourself ALREADY IN THE OUTCOME and imagine you having done the things needed to get there. Let’s say you’re someone who bites their nails… every night while you’re in bed, right before you fall asleep, simply imagine yourself with long, healthy, manicured nails… and also imagine yourself in situation where perhaps you’d normally bite your nails, but now you’re choosing not to. 

 

I can’t get into the science behind visualization in this episode because I want to keep these episodes as concise as possible, but just suspend any disbelief for a week or so, trust that this is a neurological process, and notice the changes that begin to happen in your thoughts, emotions and behaviors.

 

This is probably also a good time to mention that I’m days away from launching a FREE training called the Habit Modification Formula. In it, you’re going to discover the what why and how of everything you need to know to have complete and total control of your habits. Plus you’ll get an indepth look at the science and application of my approach. 

 

To be one of the first to get access to the free training, head over to theanthonyserino.com

Ok Now, you may or may not know… I am a board certified hypnotist… and the reason I mention that is because visualization is really the foundation for the hypnotic process. And many people will say… well I can’t visualize… but when I say visualize, or you hear something like “create a clear mental image”... what I’m really saying is use your imagination… because EVERYONE can imagine things. Unless of course someone has some severe neurological disorder.

 

But let me explain to you what I mean when I say visualization is imagination… however you IMAGINE things, is just right for you…

 

For example… I want you to IMAGINE a chair… any type of chair, it doesn’t matter… now imagine what color that chair is and then imagine what material the chair is made out of…

 

Got it? …. Ok so… you may have actually SEEN that chair in your mind… you were able to visualize it as a clear mental image… however, you may have simply just KNOWN what it looks like by imagining it… and that’s perfectly okay too… 

 

Another quick example… when someone tells me they can’t visualize or imagine things… I’ll tell them to describe what one of their loved ones looks like. Invariably… they describe their physical characteristics quite accurately… and that is visualization… whether they actually see the person in the mind is irrelevant.

 

Okay… so there’s many ways to modify, break, or develop a habit. And visualization is one of them. 

 

But there’s also things like hypnosis, which I use routinely with clients and you can actually learn to do yourself. And there’s also what are known as pattern interrupts.

 

In a moment, I’m going to teach you a super effective way to stop a habit in its tracks all on your own. The cool part is, you can use this technique anytime, anywhere, and no one will even know you’re doing anything. 

 

But before I teach you the technique. 

 

First, if your ears perked up at the word hypnosie, you’ll be pleased to know I’ll be talking more about hypnosis and self-hypnosis in future episodes… 

 

Second, I encourage you… head over to my website theanthonyserino.com and sign up to get the free training. When you do that, you’re getting access not only to the training, but also a tremendous amount of free information on a weekly basis. 

 

Okay, so pattern interrupts.

 

What I’m about to share with you is so powerful, I was able to break a 10+ year habit of drinking nearly two liters of soda a day. And I did it in less than 5 minutes.

 

The actual technique I used is a version of EFT, or tapping… I can’t teach you that one in this episode because it’s much easier to learn it by watching me demonstrate it. But don’t worry, if you don’t know what EFT or tapping is, and you wan’t to learn more, everything you need to know, including demonstrations, will be in the Habit Modifcation Formula I mentioned a few moments ago.

 

That being said… what you’re about to learn right now is JUST as effective and utilizes the same principles.

 

So to put it simply… habits are patterns of thoughts, emotions, or behavior… and these patterns or habits occur because your brain has developed neural pathways that fire in a specific away to cause you to run that pattern or habit automatically.

 

Okay, stay with me. 

 

So when you find yourself in a habit of doing something you want to stop doing… your brain has fired off the neural pathways it developed to produce that pattern of behavior. 

 

And in order to stop that pattern or habit for good you have to create NEW neural pathways in the brain that lead to the desired result.

 

You can do this very easily by CONSCIOUSLY stepping in and interrupting the pattern while it’s activated. Remember earlier when I said it might seem like I’m contradicting myself? Well, you actually do need to step in consciously in order to move your attention and interrupt the pattern. 

 

Quite simply… here’s what you do… next time you find yourself doing something you want to stop doing… and that voice in your head pops up and you ask yourself “why am I doing this shit?” All you have to do is

 

First) acknowledge to yourself that all that habit is is a response automated by your brain

Second) Say to yourself “I dismiss this habit”

Third) Instantly move your attention to something else, whether it’s a new desired behavior, a happy memory, or simply a few comfortable deep breaths

 

What this does is it causes your brain to say “Hey, I must not need to run this program because my boss is telling me they don’t need it” … and so it stops your brain from firing that neural pathway and will literally begin creating a NEW neural pathway responsible for the desired thought or behavior. 

 

For me, it was a borderline miraculous change nearly instantly and I was able to give up soda in just a few minutes.

 

However, it’s okay if you need to use this pattern interrupt multiple times over days, or even weeks.

 

Think about it this way… it’s like hiking in the woods… the more you travel down a path… the clearer and easier to travel that path gets. It’s the same with the neural pathways in the brain. The more frequently you stop the old ones from firing and your brain starts going down the new pathways, the easier it gets for your brain to do so in the future.

 

But as with anything you learn from me, don’t take my word for… just go do it and I KNOW, with a little consistency and determination… you’ll experience some dramatic results.

[AHA MOMENT]

 

Okay, so of course, Before we wrap I always ask… what was the aha factor for you in this episode? What clicked with you as soon as you heard it? Which idea connected all the dots you’ve been trying to connect for so long?

 

Maybe it was one of the more technical items we addressed in reference to the various parts of the brain? Or perhaps it was simply the conclusion that willpower just doesn’t work. No matter what the aha factor for you was this time, I know you’re developing a newfound sense of control and the more you put all of this information to use, the easier it gets. 

 

ALRIGHT that’s it for episode number four of the identity factor… if you didn’t take notes… go back, listen to this episode again, and be sure to have a pen and paper handy. Because I promise, as you commit to the changes you’re making, and you’re consistent in using the strategies I’ve shared with you, your success becomes inevitable. Also, be sure to subscribe so you can get notified as soon as next week’s episode drops. And trust me, it’s a doozy. It might even strike a few nerves because I’m going to be discussing why the relationships you’re in, both good and bad, are a reflection of you.

 

For show notes and more details on this episode head over to theanthonyserino.com and click on the podcast page.

 

[Outro]

If you’re the type of person who likes to get involved in a community of like-minded individuals come join our group Inside The Identity Factor on Facebook. Also, stay up to date with the latest content by following me on Instagram. If you have questions, I’m here to help. You can email me at [email protected] and I may even feature your question on an upcoming episode! 

 

Finally, I do have one small ask... my passion is serving others... and by you tuning in, I know you’re someone who wants wants to serve others too. We can grow together and help more people by spreading the word about this podcast. So please subscribe, share it, and leave a positive review on Apple Podcasts, Spotify, or wherever you enjoy listening. I genuinely appreciate your support.

Thanks for being here.