The scary power of accountability
Check yourself before you wreck yourself
If you want a shortcut to creating change, start being accountable to others.
For this habit hack, I want to make a simple and direct point. And this one is so powerful that there’s no need to go in depth.
Do you want change?
If the answer is yes, then define that change. Be specific. Visualize and define what it is that you want.
Once you’ve done that, articulate what behaviors need to change for you to reach that goal. Define them clearly so that anyone can measure them.
Then (and this is hard)...tell someone you’re going to make that change.
It’s really as simple as that.
I’ve repeatedly said that change has to happen on the level of IDENTITY. I call this the BE - DO - HAVE model.
BE - DO - HAVE
Be the identity you want. The identity that makes you do what you need to do in order to have the things you want.
Too often we focus on the second or third part of the equation. We think about what we want and what it takes to get there. So we start trying to create habits to get what we want, but...in order to create successful habits, this has to take place on the level of our identity.
If you want wealth, then you need to create change on the level of identity. You can’t simply change your behavior and expect everything to fall into place. You need to change on the level of Who. You. Are.
You have TO BE the person who is wealthy and that naturally creates the habits to make and sustain wealth.
It sounds “woo-woo” but it’s common sense. If you don’t have the identity for the thing that you want, then all the behavior modification in the world will do you no good.
That’s why you need to take practical steps. And that’s where accountability comes in.
Tell someone you want to change. Announce the change. Tell them specifically what you plan on doing.
From that point on, that person views you from the perspective of your new identity. When your actions don’t comply with your stated identity, they’ll call you out.
“Wait a minute, I thought you were starting a low-carb diet...why are you eating a whole pizza?”
A friend that holds you accountable cuts through all of the self-rationalization. And let’s be honest...we’re all susceptible to it.
“I’ve been working so hard at my goals...today I deserve a break.”
A friend sees through that shit. They don’t care about your rationalization. All they know is your stated goals and how they match up to your behavior (or don't). When the two don’t sync up, they call you out on it. Simple as.
When you’ve made yourself accountable, it forces you to live according to your stated identity. If you’re not willing to do that, then you’re only thinking in terms of the goal...but you’re acting in terms of your established habits, which are more comfortable to you. But those habits won’t get you to the goal.
Trust
Choose carefully who you are accountable to. Even our closest friends and families don’t always want us to succeed. It’s a cruel truth, but people want to keep us in a state where they understand us.
When we seek to create change in our lives, this forces everyone to shift how they perceive us. Not everyone is comfortable with this. When choosing who to make yourself accountable to, choose wisely.
Choose people who actually want your change. They don't want to keep you in the same place for their own comfort.
Remove the Burden
I’ve said it a million times...which means I need to keep saying it. Your brain wants you to succeed. Help your subconscious brain by taking stress off of its decision making.
Success depends on how effectively you take stress off your subconscious when making decisions. The more you are able to offload this, the more successful you’ll be. When you decide you’re going to change, make yourself accountable to others. Start acting accordingly and...stop thinking about it.
Allow other people who you trust to evaluate and check your behavior. If you trust them, they will be your best guide. As long as you’ve clearly articulated what you want to do, then you don’t have to rely on vague judgment.
If you’ve told people that you want to jog for three miles every day...then that’s pretty easy to judge. Either you did it or you didn’t. If you’ve told people that you plan on writing for your new website twice a week, then you either did it or not.
You get the picture.
Establish clear goals and make yourself accountable. Otherwise, it’s always easy to make excuses. And when you’ve established those clear goals, those people you know will consistently respond to how much you live up to your stated identity.
That’s what’s so cool about accountability. It’s freaking scary, but it’s the most direct route to putting that change you want on the level of identity.
Let’s be honest. You’re not willing to be accountable unless you’re serious. Why else do you think people try to lose weight in the winter? Because it’s less obvious then. But when you make yourself accountable, you’re putting yourself out there, and that’s the fastest way to check yourself.
Work with Anthony and hit the rocket fuel 🚀button on your success!
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